The variation of views on English

Of all the participants in this study, Ding pays the most attention to his English learning among all the participants. His perception of English acquisition as a kind of valuable cultural capital changes in particular reference to one event. Ding offers two different attitudes before and after one event - the pilot recruitment. Before this event, he is convinced that the most significant issue for him is trying his best in the science subjects. He firmly believes a traditional Chinese saying “Math, Physics and Chemistry are the strongest powers to the world.” So, at the beginning, he paid little attention to English learning.

Extract 15 (LOC_D_20130511 )

霆：你也知道，在你教我的前两年里，我的英语不怎么好……虽然你一直鼓励我，

也严格要求我……但那时我想的是英语不是那么重要吧，我保持中等水平就可以 啦！不是有句话叫做 “学好数理化，走遍天下都不怕嘛”，哈哈哈……

01. D- As you know, my English was not good enough during the first and second year when you were my English teacher…

02. Although you often encouraged me and were strict with me…

03. all I thought then was English was not so important and it was enough that I had an average level of English.

04. It is always said “Mathematics, Physics and Chemistry are the strongest powers to the world.” How…how…

When he mentioned that, he paused for several moments and was a bit embarrassed.

His laugh aimed to release his embarrassment and show some certain extent of self-mockery. The reason is that at the time when he talked about his past, he had

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totally changed his mind and felt that English played a significant role in his life.

What made him change his mind so radically was the pilot recruitment.

In China, every year the pilot recruitment is held among the secondary school and college students. Once one passes the tests and becomes a pilot, he/she will be seen as a hero. So the tests are incredibly difficult and grueling. The tests include the following eight stages in total:

Stage 1. Getting the qualification for recruitment.

Stage 2. Passing an initial physical examination that includes gripping force, blood pressure, heart, lungs, kidney, vision check, chromoscopy, eye check, and ear-nose-throat.

Stage 3. If the initial physical exam is passed, a much more indepth physical examination consisting of one hundred and fifty tests in total is done.

Stage 4. Psychology test.

Stage 5. Political vetting.

Stage 6. Academic subject examination with a focus on mathematics and English.

Stage 7. Another physical re-examination.

Stage 8. Enrolment.

Ding passed the first five examinations and failed at the sixth one because his English did not meet the required standards. This failure was a thunderbolt out of a clear sky for him and he suffered a long-term depression. At that time, I was his English teacher.

Though his English was not good, we still had a good relationship. So he came to me many times and each time he would cry and talk about how he regretted not investing more in English. However, following that incident, he made a significant investment in English learning. He frequently came to my office to consult me about many questions and even asked me to offer supplementary instruction during the weekends.

Despite this newly-found interest and investment in English, even after he went to college, he still felt regret about his low English acquisition.

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Extract 16 (LF2F_D_ JOB_20131201) 滕：你的飞行员梦，现在还觉得遗憾吗？

霆：当然。那对我是个多么大的打击啊。你知道吗，我几乎已经触摸到它了。它 那么近我觉得我几乎已经抓住了。但是，我摔下来了，从天堂到地狱。当时我甚 至想我的余生都不会有色彩了。直到现在，我都在后悔为什么不好好学英语呢！

很多个睡不着的夜里，我都会想到这件事情。如果我当初好好学习英语，如果……

可是这个世上没有“如果”，唉……

01. T- Are you still sorry about your pilot dream?

02. D- Of course. It was a big blow for me.

03. You know, I almost reached my dream.

04. It was so close that I felt I almost caught it.

05. But I fell down, from heaven to hell.

06. At that moment, I even thought there would be no color for my rest life.

07. Even now, I regret not devoting myself to English.

08. During many nights, when I can’t sleep, I will think about it.

09. If only I had worked hard on English! If only……

10. But there is no “if” in the world. Ah……

The unsuccessful experience in pilot recruitment was a crucial blow for him that made him feel like he had fallen “from heaven to hell” and that there was “no color for my rest life” (line 05-06, Extract 16 above). Furthermore, this experience was a turning point in regards to his attitude towards English. From this experience, he learned that English could have been the ‘bridge’ to his dream of becoming a pilot. So he felt upset and regretted for a long term (line 07, Extract 16 above) his lack of investment in this potential capital. As a consequence his perception of whether English could be a valuable form of cultural capital varied considerably since then.

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When he graduated from high school, Ding chose Aviation mechanics and electrical equipment maintenance as his major in Xi’an Aeronautical University. In his interview, he told me that even if he could not be a pilot he was still eager to do any work related to planes. As we have seen, at his college, he had devoted much time and energy to English learning in the hopes of becoming a pilot. In extract 3, Ding underscores his dedication to English learning and how lucky he felt that his English teacher helped him a lot during this studies at college.

Extract 17 (LF2F_D_CEL_20131201) 滕：你现在的英语怎么样？

霆：比以前好多了，我花了不少功夫。

滕：你都花了哪些功夫啊？

霆：很多啊，啊，这真是段痛苦的经历。你也知道的，我英语基础不好。谢天谢 地，我现在的英语老师人很好知识也渊博，他给了我很多帮助。所以，我现在有 点进步了吧，嗯，有进步了。

01.T- How is you English now?

02. D- It is much better than before. I have worked on it a lot.

03. T- What have you done to study English?

04. D- A lot. Oh, it is a painful experience.

05. You know, my English was so poor before.

06. Thanks goodness, my English teacher is kind and erudite.

07. He offers me great help. So, I have made improvement…yes, I have.

Ding highlights that his English teacher was kind and erudite and gave him much help (line 06-07, Extract 17 above), bringing out the importance of intersubjective positioning in regards to learning investment. With both his own effort and his teacher’s help, he improved in English learning and it seemed that his personal development became more promising.

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